Marriage

Are You Changing Your Last Name?

Before I got engaged, changing my last name wasn’t something I thought a lot about. I just assumed I’d take Conor’s last name and even ordered a makeup bag, pajamas, and a tote bag monogrammed with DMS. The whole monogram thing was fun while we were engaged. I keep getting asked if I’m going to change my list name. 

Are You Changing Your Last Name?

The short answer is no, for now. I just couldn’t bring myself to give up a really important piece of who I am, even though it’s not always who I’ve been. After graduating high school, I legally changed my last name my maternal grandfather’s last name (Moss). Growing up, I went by my step-dad’s last name, but he and my mom divorced when I was in high school, and I didn’t feel right keeping it. My grandfather meant so much to me and my mom (his only child) changed her last name, so I’m the only Moss. Even though it’s only been my last name for a little less than half my life, it feels like such a big part of who I am.

But the right thing is to do what feels right for you. With my daughter arriving in just a few months, this is something I’ve been thinking about recently. Should we have the same last name? Does it matter? Why/why not? Maybe I’ll change my mind. Things like this don’t have to be so black and white, and I think it’s best to stay open. Conor doesn’t seem to care (which I appreciate) and my friends seem pretty split, too. There’s obviously no right or wrong answer and maybe I’ll want to change it someday but for now, I’ve decided to keep Moss.

I’d love to know where you all stand. Would you or did you change your last name? Why? Why not?