Conversations with Aunt Rose

My mom, Jess, and I took a trip to Target today. After Target, we went to pick up my 91 year old great aunt Rose to have a BBQ and watch the Laker game at my mom’s house. I called Rose on my cell to ask her if she could be ready in five minutes. She said no. I asked if seven minutes would be ok and she said yes. I was kidding, but it worked.

She got in the car and said “I wasn’t dressed because I had a little bit of a calamity. The calamity was that I was in the kitchen and had to boil water. I had a certain dish and all of a sudden the dish exploded.”

The conversation continued…

My mom: Is it ceramic?
Rose: I don’t know. I’ll find out what ceramic is.
Jess: Don’t you have a tea kettle?
Rose: The tea kettle is another calamity.

We get to the house and sit down in the living room. I went and got my iPad so I could show it to Rose.

Rose: What is that?
Me: It’s like a little computer.
Rose: Do you put it on the wall?
Me: No.
Rose: Are you selling those?
Me: Haha. No.

Flipped over the iPad and showed her a clip of The Holiday. Her reply?
Her lips are moving. You aren’t pushing any buttons.

A few other funny statements:
Is Joe expected early? Because I didn’t wear a bra.

This fellow that lived next door came to see me and we had a long conversation.

Me: Happy Birthday!
Rose: Thank you! Who is this?
Me: Danielle.
Rose: I’m glad you got around to calling. It’s my birthday.